25 November, 2009

Kami and Payden's Most Joyous Creation.




Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you the single best thing I've ever written:

Mary's Little Lamb
"Mary had a little lamb, whose fleece was white as snow.
And everywhere that Mary went the lamb was sure to go."
This is the happy Nursery Rhyme that most of you must know,
But here's my version of the tale, a version full of woe.

I am the sheep that followed her all over, to and fro.
But what's not known to most of you is unwilling did I go.
I didn't want to follow her all stinking night and day,
if it weren't for the amount of money some would love to pay.

What little Mary didn't know as she climbed into her bed
Was that the 'helpless little lamb' held a bounty on her head.
You see, she had an enemy who watched her in her sleep,
Hoping to one day harm her. The enemy - Bo Peep.

Bo Peep had come to me one day, all flustered in her anger.
I asked her how she wanted it done, and she replied "Just hang her."
So that is why, my dearest friends, I run around with ammo,
and why I have to hide in bushes wearing lots of camo.

And so your nursery rhyme is false, because I took the prize!
But no happy, cheery fairy tale ends with a girl's demise.


Written circa 2005 or 2006.
Yes, we are rad.

Voicemail Favourites: August 1 - November 18, 2009.

Chandler Wood - August 1. 11:35pm
"Hey Kami, it's Chandler. Um I'm probably a little more drunk than I should be right now. WHOOOOOOOOOAAAAAA... Anyway. So, um... yeah. We uh didn't get to hang out tonight, but we'll definitely have to hang out next time you're up here. And definitely miss you. And, uh... wow! I am a LOT more drunk than I should be right now. I probably shouldn't be calling people and leaving messages right now. But uh, anyway. Um, send me a message on facebook or something. Or call me, calling's cool too. You can talk to me. Um, that's cool. Um, yeah but I will definitely talk to you later, and definitely missed you tonight, and we'll have to hang out when you're here again, so have a good night, and a safe drive home tomorrow, and... we'll talk to you later! Alright, have a good night, 'bye.

Amber Heifner - August 3. 9:47am
(with a full mouth) "Hey, it's me. I have cake, come over. Love you, 'bye."

Nathan Smith - August 23. 6:22pm
"Hello darling, this is Nathan, I'm just rolling out of Kaysville just now, so. I'll probably be in Cedar around 10:00 or so, so bear that in mind, and I will be seeing you soon. Just wanted to give you a call back, Alright, I'll see you later. 'Bye."

Lorin Bruns - August 27. 11:48am
"Hey Kami, this is Lorin. Hey, just calling to see how you are. Haven't seen you in forever, so anyway. Yup, just seeing how you are, how's life, whatnot. Yeah. Oh yeah, and like Beatles Rock Band comes out in like less than two weeks, and I really wish you were up here to play it with me when I get it so, anyway, I'll see you."

Casey Winters - October 17. 2:24pm
(In a high, creepity voice)"Hello, young child. I'm sorry I missed your call. I'm headed to work. I feel terrible. I hope you call me back sometime in the future, but probably not today because I have to work. As I said I'm heading to work right now. To work, you know for money. Okay, that is all. Oh, I'm headed to work. Okay, 'bye."

Nathan Smith - October 24. 8:04pm
"Hey Kami. I just watched your scene through the door with Katie Wacko and Jesse, and we all agreed that it was really good. You were REAL good, so I just wanted you to know that even though I didn't get in, I did stay to watch your scene, and uh... good! I'm glad that you got that role, it's perfect for you, especially with the spreading your legs and stuff. I liked that line. Anyway, let me know when you head over to Amber's house. We're just going to head over to Jesse and Katie's place. So, just give me a call. Alright, thanks, 'bye."

Brian Cota - November 17. 3:09pm
"Hey you, it's me. I'm just calling to see how you are, I heard about your accident, and I wanted to make sure you were okay. Give me a call, as always, my life is ridiculously crazy, so... Please understand if I don't answer, because I'm probably doing something. Anyway, love you and hope you're okay. And I'll talk to you later. 'Bye!"

Casey Winters - November 18. 11:12pm
"I wonder how that lady feels, whose voice comes up on the message thing, you know that's like (woman's voice)'at the tone, leave a message. To leave a callback number, press blah blah blah.' Like, do you think she calls people and like, freaks out or maybe it's not a real person. I don't know, but I think it would be pretty cool. I wish that was my voice. In fact, now I'm going to talk like her. (woman's voice)'Kami, when will you be here next week so we can hang out? We need to schedule a time because I know you are so busy when you come up. Okay. To leave a callback number, do a little dance.' Okay 'bye."

23 November, 2009

All my Facebook Statuses Since August 2008

Starting with the most recent:

All Status Updates So Far:

Sun November 22, 2009, 10:06 pm: I LOVE BEING HOME!!!

Sun November 22, 2009, 12:24 pm: is sorry for missing Spitfire Grill, but heard the show was great. SO proud of all my friends. Love you all.

Wed November 18, 2009, 11:30 pm: ROY LICHTENSTEIN MAKEUP TOMORROW!!! SO STOKED!!!! =]

Tue November 17, 2009, 9:16 am: Carcrash + whiplash + insufficient ibuprofen = not a good day.

Sun November 15, 2009, 7:18 pm: Etterbob = True Love.

Fri November 13, 2009, 9:40 am: FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH!!! Already shaping up to be a pretty radical day. =]

Wed November 4, 2009, 5:14 pm: can't even wait to see Mom and Dad tomorrow. MAN, I've missed them.

Tue November 3, 2009, 6:43 pm: has successfully been reunited with her camera. Oh Cammy, I've missed you. (Yes, I named my camera after myself. What of it?)

Wed October 28, 2009, 3:47 pm: misses you.

Thu October 22, 2009, 7:56 pm: Some Girls is ROCKIN' tonight!!!

Tue October 13, 2009, 4:05 pm: can get by with a little help from her friends. AND can get high with a little help from her friends. (Or her character in Some Girls.)

Wed October 7, 2009, 10:09 pm: ....with my By Myself.

Tue October 6, 2009, 5:23 pm: was just on Power 91. Yes, the school's radio. Weird.

Sun October 4, 2009, 9:30 pm: doesn't hear cocnuts banging together.

Tue September 29, 2009, 12:37 pm: Class, lunch, work, rehearsal, work, dinner, rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal.

Wed September 23, 2009, 4:12 pm: loves polos.

Mon September 14, 2009, 2:22 pm: has a new neice. Welcome to the world, Saydee June! I real like you.

Sun September 13, 2009, 10:13 pm: Dear My-Brother's-Cat, If you would be so kind as to stop climbing all over my lap, I would greatly appreciate it. You're making me sniffly. Love, Kami.

Fri September 11, 2009, 1:35 pm: Dear The-Numb-Half-Of-My-Face, what the heck? Please get some feeling again, because you're really weirding me out. Love, Kami.

Fri September 11, 2009, 10:05 am: Today sucks real bad.

Wed September 9, 2009, 9:52 pm: We're actors - we're the opposite of people.

Tue September 8, 2009, 7:01 pm: Dear My-Tooth-That-Was-Just-Root-Canalled, enough with the throbbing already. Not kidding, Kami.

Tue September 8, 2009, 1:28 pm: is supposed to be the leading lady of her own life, dangit.

Fri September 4, 2009, 4:34 pm: tuts ma baddeh.

Tue September 1, 2009, 11:27 am: Procrastinating my paper? Check! Thinking about that cute guy in my ward? Check! Hopped up on cold meds? CHECK!

Mon August 31, 2009, 9:33 pm: Why is it that my nose won't stop running, yet at the same time, I feel like it's always stuffy? I hate colds.

Mon August 31, 2009, 8:16 am: Dear My Credit Union, you're pretty dang rad. Thanks for giving me all my money back. I like you. Love, Kami

Thu August 27, 2009, 1:15 pm: Okay, enough with the angry credit card status... I GOT THE LIBRARY JOB! I am exuberant.

Wed August 26, 2009, 2:03 pm: Dear Whoever-Has-Been-Using-My-Credit-Card-In-Orem, PLEASE stop it. I realize you might be poor, but I am too. Also, you may just have wrecked my entire week. Thanks for nothing, Kami.

Tue August 25, 2009, 9:46 pm: Though we’ve been spurned by it, let’s still believe in love. 'Cause love is the greatest gift of the ugly to the beautiful.

Tue August 25, 2009, 12:17 pm: Wish me luck on my JOB INTERVIEW!!!! I'm tailor made for this Librarian job. =]

Mon August 24, 2009, 5:26 pm: Dear First Day of School, I think you're pretty darn great. Thanks for the rad Sci Fi class and also the news about a job interview. Love, Kami.

Sat August 22, 2009, 2:44 pm: Hey new haircut... I'd like you better if I could figure out how to style you the right way. Love, Kami

Thu August 20, 2009, 9:51 pm: is a singer in a smoky room. The smell of wine and cheap perfume.

Wed August 19, 2009, 11:20 am: is watching Lehi's Godspell right now!!! I miss it.

Tue August 18, 2009, 8:11 pm: will be out of her mind and you'll be out of ideas pretty soon. So let's spend the afternoon in a cold hot air balloon.

Mon August 17, 2009, 11:09 pm: “Who in the world am I?” Ah, that’s the great puzzle.

Sun August 16, 2009, 5:19 pm: Handerpants are good for updating your facebook status.

Sun August 16, 2009, 4:01 pm: is being all reminiscent and missing Godspell...

Sat August 15, 2009, 12:02 pm: District 9 = PHENOMENALLY GOOD.

Thu August 13, 2009, 9:39 am: You know those days where everything is aligned, and things are just going right? That's today.

Wed August 12, 2009, 2:03 pm: Chestnut brown canary, ruby-throated sparrow. Sing your song, don't be long. Thrill me to the marrow.

Wed August 12, 2009, 8:14 am: need....more....sleep.

Tue August 11, 2009, 11:40 pm: Dear Meryl Streep: PLEASE do more movies soon, because you're basically phenomenal.

Tue August 11, 2009, 10:33 am: 3 days!!!

Tue August 11, 2009, 1:14 am: a little bit wants to punch some people. Or maybe hire a hitman. Anyone got connections?

Mon August 10, 2009, 9:25 am: wants to be in Disneyland.

Sun August 9, 2009, 7:09 pm: "Hey Max, remember me? I'm Fred's hand!"

Sat August 8, 2009, 1:37 am: Today was a good day.

Thu August 6, 2009, 3:16 pm: Moviewatching, check. Welcome-Back-Kotter-ing, in progress.

Thu August 6, 2009, 1:15 pm: Laundering, check. Dishwashing, check. Bedmaking, check. Moviewatching, in progress.

Wed August 5, 2009, 7:50 pm: Dear Today, I hate that you wore me out, but I love that you necessitate icecream. Thanks, Kami.

Wed August 5, 2009, 2:41 pm: Dr. Pepper + Blackberry flavor + Milk = Heaven. Thank you Ty at the Chili's.

Tue August 4, 2009, 11:12 pm: Dear Col. Sanders, what's with the "Buttery Spread" and "Honey Sauce?" Is there any actual butter and honey at your establishment? Just wondering. Love, Kami

Mon August 3, 2009, 9:49 pm: "Rockabye Baby, BANG! heh heh." - Deadpool.

Mon August 3, 2009, 2:09 am: ☀

Sat August 1, 2009, 12:55 am: Why do I do things?

Wed July 29, 2009, 11:37 pm: Baby's on the half tip!

Wed July 29, 2009, 2:59 pm: was All-Camp Capture-the-Flag Champ at Camp Takajo

Tue July 28, 2009, 9:01 pm: is better than Catwoman.

Tue July 28, 2009, 2:26 pm: Dear Thunderstorms, I love you.

Tue July 28, 2009, 11:51 am: mac and cheese + snuggly quilt + Becoming Jane.

Sun July 26, 2009, 9:00 am: has phenomenal cosmic powers, and itty bitty living space.

Sat July 25, 2009, 11:20 pm: is judging Vince.

Sat July 25, 2009, 4:10 pm: I NEED YOUR PHONE NUMBERS FOR MY NEW PHONE!!! Seriously, please?

Thu July 23, 2009, 9:26 pm: Cell phone + hot tub - Jackie Chan like reflexes = no bueno.

Tue July 21, 2009, 10:01 pm: Dear Creepy-Man-In-A-Joker-Mask that peered through the Little Caesar's window at me, stop it. You're creepin' me out.

Tue July 21, 2009, 12:50 pm: Cellar Door.

Mon July 20, 2009, 2:18 pm: Dear Thunderstorm, please don't leave yet. Sincerely, Kami.

Sat July 18, 2009, 9:19 am: is caught like traps in a rat.

Thu July 16, 2009, 11:42 am: - all is fair in love and war. Including facepunching.

Wed July 15, 2009, 2:16 am: approves Half Blood Prince.

Mon July 13, 2009, 11:34 pm: Half Blood Prince in less than twenty-four hours. Delightful.

Mon July 13, 2009, 4:25 pm: Dear Queen, Please bring Freddie Mercury back to life and get back together. It would make my life very joyous indeed. Thank you. Sincerely, Kami

Sun July 12, 2009, 8:29 am: - We made the grade and still we wonder who the hell we are.

Sat July 11, 2009, 2:36 pm: - You know what I hate most about Cedar City? No 7-11's on Free Slurpee Day.

Sat July 11, 2009, 10:25 am: loves eating PB&J while watching The Little Mermaid.

Fri July 10, 2009, 10:35 am: can never get enough, enough of this stuff. It's Friday, I'm in love.

Thu July 9, 2009, 9:14 am: needs to borrow a cute black trenchcoat from someone...

Wed July 8, 2009, 11:58 am: hates dollars. AND the lack thereof.

Tue July 7, 2009, 4:42 pm: : mmmmm. Wontons.

Tue July 7, 2009, 9:12 am:

Mon July 6, 2009, 2:57 pm: can't wait to hang out with Brock and Nancy today.

Fri July 3, 2009, 5:38 pm: Zoo = pwned

Wed July 1, 2009, 1:46 pm: - Practically Perfect in Every Way.

Sat June 27, 2009, 10:37 pm: : And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.

Thu June 25, 2009, 10:15 pm: is one sharptoothed buzzard sitting in a dead tree.

Thu June 25, 2009, 4:42 pm: LOVE tomorrow!

Sun June 21, 2009, 5:40 pm: is eating in the ghetto on a hundred dollar plate.

Sat June 20, 2009, 12:47 am: will hear your name coming out from a boom box. She will hear your name called out from passing cars.

Fri June 19, 2009, 10:16 am: supposes her toeses are roses.

Wed June 17, 2009, 10:49 pm: simultaneously loves and hates BarnesandNoble.com. Hates because she has no dollars to spend there. Loves because, well, duh, it's BarnesandNoble.com!

Mon June 15, 2009, 10:02 pm: tends to 4th wall people when she's telling them stories. That's how you know she's an actress.

Sun June 14, 2009, 3:29 pm: would fall to pieces for Pieces of Eight.

Fri June 12, 2009, 11:55 pm: - Shake and a hug and a pumpkin patch.

Wed June 10, 2009, 1:31 pm: would kill a bird, especially if it were mocking her.

Tue June 9, 2009, 11:42 am: is alone on a bicycle built for two.

Mon June 8, 2009, 10:41 am: is just a small town girl, living in a lonely world. She took a midnight train going anywhere.

Sun June 7, 2009, 5:55 pm: Kami: "What would Karen Carpenter say?" Katy: "I really want a sandwich?"

Sun June 7, 2009, 5:34 pm: is waiting to watch the 2009 Antoinette Perry Awards... =]

Sat June 6, 2009, 11:53 pm: is NOT the exception, she's the rule.

Fri June 5, 2009, 2:59 pm: ☂

Wed June 3, 2009, 10:05 am: ☮

Sun May 31, 2009, 7:19 pm: : MEAT SWEATS.

Fri May 29, 2009, 11:03 am: - Happy Kamikkuh.

Thu May 28, 2009, 12:18 pm: - When I was driving once I saw this painted on a bridge: "I don't want the world. I just want your half."

Wed May 27, 2009, 7:29 am: read the news today, oh boy. Four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire. And though the holes were rather small, they'd had to count them all. Now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall.

Mon May 25, 2009, 8:10 pm: DID just say "Dooble Droogan."

Fri May 22, 2009, 7:58 pm: is out of her Vulcan mind.

Thu May 21, 2009, 4:39 pm: is bakin' like a toasted cheeser, it's so hot here.

Sun May 17, 2009, 8:17 pm: - Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.

Sat May 16, 2009, 9:56 pm: is moving to china. Not really, but could you imagine if I did?

Sat May 16, 2009, 9:54 pm: moving to china. Not really, but could you imagine if I did?

Sat May 16, 2009, 8:43 am: is going to the carnival tonight. Cotton Candy and Creepy Carnies Galore!

Fri May 15, 2009, 9:51 pm: loves Domino's online Pizza Tracker more than anything else in the world right now.

Thu May 14, 2009, 3:35 pm: had a good time today, but sitting still is such hard work.

Thu May 14, 2009, 1:35 am: has a job modeling for Del Parson in the morning. =]

Mon May 11, 2009, 11:21 am: loves having Maggie Moo's for breakfast. Jealous?

Sun May 10, 2009, 1:58 pm: is trying to escape the "Willies of the Devil."

Sun May 10, 2009, 1:56 pm: is invited to her roommate's family dinner for Mother's Day. RADICAL.

Wed May 6, 2009, 4:35 pm: is walking out in the rain, and she is listening to the low moan of the dial tone again. Both hands, no please use both hands.

Tue May 5, 2009, 11:10 pm: can't wait for Friday.

Tue May 5, 2009, 2:45 pm: wants to celebrate Cinco de Mayo with some Mockeritas.

Tue May 5, 2009, 12:41 am: was saved by her Pinchers of Power.

Sun May 3, 2009, 8:04 pm: has eyes that can start wars.

Tue April 28, 2009, 9:43 pm: wants someone provocative and talkative. But it's so hard when you're shallow as a shower. Her bone structure screams "touch her, touch her."

Sun April 26, 2009, 12:36 pm: fights for her life as she puts on her coat, and she fights for her life on the train. She looks at the rain as it pours, and she fights for her life, as she goes in a store with a thought she has caught by a thread. She pays for the bread and she goes. N

Sun April 26, 2009, 11:12 am: hates when she doesn't wake up in time for church.

Fri April 24, 2009, 3:35 pm: sees Kate and Michael in less than 2 hours!

Thu April 23, 2009, 2:03 pm: Dear Universe, PLEASE stop being so mean to me. Love, Kami

Fri April 17, 2009, 2:12 pm: "...And every breath we drew was hallelujah..."

Tue April 14, 2009, 10:01 pm: : Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt.

Tue April 14, 2009, 11:17 am: is real true tired.

Sat April 11, 2009, 9:51 am: wants to go home and see everyone. Most especially Taylor, Bryan, Austin, Mikelle, & Elizabeth.

Sat April 11, 2009, 9:44 am: wants to go home and see everyone. Most especially Taylor, Brian, Austin, Mikelle, & Elizabeth.

Wed April 8, 2009, 8:05 am: High diddle-dee-dee, an actor's life for me.

Tue April 7, 2009, 3:27 pm: really loves Eastertime candies. Most especially StarBurst Jelly Beans.

Mon April 6, 2009, 3:37 pm: is addicted to Tootsie Rolls.

Fri April 3, 2009, 3:49 pm: wants about 4 Hershey's Cookies and Cream candy bars, 44 ounces of Pepsi, and 2 whole pizzas all to herself.

Wed April 1, 2009, 2:44 pm: thinks it's about time for her birthday to roll around.

Tue March 31, 2009, 2:10 pm: shouldn't have watched Pan's Labyrinth this morning. She feels like puking a little. Good movie, though.

Fri March 27, 2009, 8:31 am: could really use some Raisin Brahms: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKgBdrsqvjs

Thu March 26, 2009, 9:38 am: can't even fathom how it's possible that Michael comes home today. Has it REALLY been two years already?

Tue March 24, 2009, 7:45 pm: should really check out this so-called "gym" thing everyone's been talking about.

Tue March 24, 2009, 1:58 pm: has never been so hungry in her whole life.

Thu March 19, 2009, 10:56 am: woke up at 11:30. Spring break is treating her well.

Sat March 14, 2009, 2:46 pm: is celebrating PI day by making apple pie with lattice crust AND cheesecake (which is really more of a pie than a cake if you think about it).

Sat March 14, 2009, 10:42 am: is celebrating PI day by making apple pie. WITH lattice crust. YUM.

Fri March 13, 2009, 2:41 pm: really hates this new facebook. Why can't things just be normal??

Wed March 11, 2009, 2:52 pm: Kami Bo Bammy, Banana Fanna Fo Fammy.

Wed March 11, 2009, 8:25 am: needs to check the callback list. Wish her luck.

Mon March 9, 2009, 6:58 pm: Teryaki, cooking cats since 1988. (it's a real place!!) http://www.menuism.com/restaurants/dY0F2-jQ0r24upabBlKsEs-kami-teriyaki-renton-wa

Mon March 9, 2009, 2:54 pm: hates that the only facebook notifications she gets these days are those stupid "tag which of your friends would be this cartoon character" things.

Fri March 6, 2009, 3:31 pm: is about to embark on a most delightful journey, according to her fortune cookie.

Thu March 5, 2009, 4:57 pm: watches the Watchmen.

Mon March 2, 2009, 4:12 pm: and Brian are going on a date to the Public Library soon! PERFECT.

Thu February 26, 2009, 12:11 pm: bets you on land they understand. Bet they don't reprimand their daughters.

Wed February 25, 2009, 9:08 am: - Vagina Monologues - LAST CHANCE - 7:30 - $5 - Sharwan Smith Center Theatre - PLEASE COME!!!

Tue February 24, 2009, 11:53 am: - Vagina Monologues - Today and Tomorrow - 7:30 - $5 - Sharwan Smith Center Theatre

Mon February 23, 2009, 3:41 pm: - Vagina Monologues - Tuesday and Wednesday - 7:30 - $5

Fri February 20, 2009, 4:30 pm: is trying to figure out how to make lekku.

Tue February 17, 2009, 3:14 pm: is looking forward to chocolate bundt cake, thanks to Bri.

Sat February 14, 2009, 11:11 am: sure thought it was Saturday this morning. Thanks Life, for that lovely little treat when it was.

Fri February 13, 2009, 4:32 pm: sure thought it was Saturday this morning. Thanks Life, for that rude awakening when she realized it wasn't.

Thu February 12, 2009, 3:14 pm: is just a small town girl, living in a lonely world. She took a midnight train going anywhere.

Tue February 10, 2009, 6:40 pm: kind of hates that ACTF took everyone away from her.

Mon February 9, 2009, 3:46 pm: found her old dancing shoes, but they don't fit. All the bright lights do is bore her, they bore her, they bore her.

Fri February 6, 2009, 4:19 pm: - ma belle. Sont des mots qui vont très bien ensemble.

Thu February 5, 2009, 4:47 pm: used to have to entertain herself a lot as a kid. And usually the best way to do that was to turn on the T.V.

Wed February 4, 2009, 9:05 am: would rather shoot herself in the face than admit that Vince is more than a man, but less than a God.

Tue February 3, 2009, 4:21 pm: is listening to Buddy Holly. R.I.P (50th anniversary of The Day the Music Died.)

Sun February 1, 2009, 5:10 pm: can take the crosstown bus if it's raining or it's cold. And the animals will love it if she does.

Thu January 29, 2009, 12:27 pm: is The Seagull. (Come see the show tonight @ 7:30. Free with valid student ID.)

Wed January 28, 2009, 8:46 am: - "Catwoman's got nothin' on me."

Fri January 23, 2009, 9:35 am: is filmed before a live studio audience.

Tue January 20, 2009, 12:35 pm: - What's the difference between light and a man with no arms? Light can at least demonstrate the properties of a wave.

Tue January 20, 2009, 12:34 pm: - What's the difference between light and a man with no arms? Light can at least demonstrate the property of a wave.

Wed January 14, 2009, 3:45 pm: - roses are #FF0000, violets are #0000FF; All my base are belong to you.

Wed January 14, 2009, 3:44 pm: - roses are #FF0000 violets are #0000FF all my base are belong to you.

Tue January 13, 2009, 12:57 pm: doesn't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth.

Mon January 12, 2009, 8:34 am: is scared of corsets.

Sat January 10, 2009, 9:17 am: does NOT want to speak in church tomorrow.

Thu January 8, 2009, 12:04 pm: is enraged at Warner Bros. AND WILL NOT SEE HARRY POTTER 6 ON OPENING WEEKEND! A PG RATING?! So, you delay the movie 8 months, and then sugar coat the material?

Mon January 5, 2009, 3:37 pm: is completely inert, her origin and purpose still a total mystery...

Mon January 5, 2009, 12:25 am: is is completely inert, her origin and purpose still a total mystery...

Fri January 2, 2009, 9:31 am: misses her brain-mate. (You know who you are.) =]

Thu January 1, 2009, 7:39 pm: is lookin' at you, kid.

Thu January 1, 2009, 2:37 pm: is having a 10th Kingdom Marathon... AGAIN.

Wed December 31, 2008, 8:22 am: thinks that "You better hold on tight, Spider Monkey" is this year's "Nobody puts Baby in a corner."

Wed December 31, 2008, 8:21 am: thinks that "You better hold on, Spider Monkey" is this year's "Nobody puts Baby in a corner."

Tue December 30, 2008, 1:07 pm: : Hold me closer, Tony Danza.

Tue December 30, 2008, 9:55 am: shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

Mon December 29, 2008, 12:44 am: wants to scream.

Sun December 21, 2008, 5:11 pm: has all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch!

Tue December 16, 2008, 11:24 am: is a three decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce.

Mon December 15, 2008, 12:13 am: has a crush on a wolf. And it's not Jacob Black either.

Sat December 13, 2008, 10:39 pm: loves The 10th Kingdom. "Suck an Elf!"

Sat December 13, 2008, 10:39 pm:

Fri December 12, 2008, 10:28 am: hates that she found chopcorn in her hair when she got home.

Fri December 12, 2008, 10:28 am: hates that she found chopcorn in her hair when she got home. Vile.

Fri December 12, 2008, 10:27 am:

Wed December 10, 2008, 9:16 pm: is going to have a pair of pants together with Jasha.

Wed December 10, 2008, 9:15 pm:

Mon December 8, 2008, 3:06 pm: needs an escape. "The Office" will have to do for now...

Sun November 30, 2008, 12:26 am: loves her new boyfriend, C-3PO.

Sat November 29, 2008, 5:50 pm: wants to learn Samoan.

Thu November 27, 2008, 9:26 am: is thankful for the 11 pies her mom made. OH BUDDY.

Tue November 25, 2008, 4:05 pm: is HOME! 'Bout time.

Mon November 24, 2008, 1:22 pm: can't wait to see her family.

Mon November 24, 2008, 1:23 am:

Mon November 24, 2008, 1:23 am: :|]

Fri November 21, 2008, 11:20 am: has framed animals before. She framed a racoon for opening a Christmas present. And she framed a bear for eating out of the garbage.

Thu November 20, 2008, 4:29 pm: is is pretty sure that lusting after a vampire should technically be considered necrophilia.

Tue November 18, 2008, 2:18 pm: - Probably the earliest flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.

Tue November 18, 2008, 2:17 pm:

Tue November 18, 2008, 2:17 pm: - If you go parachuting, and your parachute doesn't open, and you friends are all watching you fall, I think a funny gag would be to pretend you were swimming.

Fri November 14, 2008, 3:37 pm: is a little bit in love. With Jim Halpert.

Fri November 14, 2008, 3:37 pm:

Wed November 12, 2008, 12:10 pm: thinks that before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away AND you have their shoes.

Tue November 11, 2008, 3:48 pm: thinks it's sad that a family can be torn apart by something as simple as a pack of wild dogs.

Tue November 11, 2008, 3:11 pm:

Sun November 9, 2008, 9:07 pm: hurt her shoulder somehow. And then Emilie had to put some freezy cream on it, and now her shoulder is probably going to freeze right off of her body.

Sun November 9, 2008, 9:06 pm:

Sat November 8, 2008, 9:28 am: is watching footage of Woodstock. INCREDIBLE.

Fri November 7, 2008, 10:43 pm: just spent a whole night shooting craps

Fri November 7, 2008, 10:42 pm:

Thu November 6, 2008, 12:28 pm: can't wait to watch "The Office" tonight!

Wed November 5, 2008, 12:25 pm: - "Remember, Remember the Fifth of November..."

Sat November 1, 2008, 3:15 pm: wants to go to the beach this summer and bury metal objects that say "get a life" on them.

Fri October 31, 2008, 2:04 pm: is Rosie the Riveter

Fri October 31, 2008, 2:03 pm:

Thu October 30, 2008, 12:39 pm: and Emilie Andersen live in a house of infectious disease. Also, Kami just added about a million photos. Go have a looksie.

Wed October 29, 2008, 8:38 pm: and Emilie Andersen live in a house of infectious disease.

Wed October 29, 2008, 1:09 am: doesn't know what to think!

Sun October 26, 2008, 11:29 am: is a guitar hero, not an english-homework-doing hero.

Wed October 22, 2008, 4:50 pm: is a somnambulist.

Fri October 17, 2008, 1:47 pm: is si imaK

Fri October 17, 2008, 1:47 pm:

Fri October 17, 2008, 1:18 pm: is wearing black because she's in mourning for her life. She's unhappy.

Mon October 13, 2008, 11:49 am: thinks the perfect boyfriend is a mixture of Seth Cohen, Jim Halpert, Peter Petrelli, Edward Cullen, and Gene Kelley. Any other suggestions?

Mon October 13, 2008, 11:47 am: thinks the perfect boyfriend is a mixture of Seth Cohen, Peter Petrelli, Jim Halpert, Edward Cullen, and Gene Kelley. Any other suggestions?

Mon October 13, 2008, 11:42 am:

Mon October 6, 2008, 9:27 pm: + Peter Petrelli = LOVE

Mon October 6, 2008, 12:44 pm: misses her best friend.

Thu October 2, 2008, 5:17 pm: just had her ship invaded by the Romulans.

Thu October 2, 2008, 5:17 pm:

Wed October 1, 2008, 1:45 pm: is sailing away. Set an open course for the virgin sea.

Wed October 1, 2008, 1:44 pm:

Sun September 28, 2008, 3:42 pm: don't need T.V. when she's got T. Rex

Sun September 28, 2008, 3:42 pm:

Wed September 24, 2008, 2:05 pm: is chillin' out, maxin', relaxin' all cool, and all shooting some b-ball outside of the school

Wed September 24, 2008, 2:05 pm:

Wed September 24, 2008, 2:04 pm: is chillin' out, maxin', relaxin' all cool, And all shooting some b-ball outside of the school

Sun September 21, 2008, 3:04 pm: is NOT wanting to drive back home...

Mon September 15, 2008, 7:06 pm: is gonna visit those foreclosing son-of-a-guns at the Indianola Savings & Loan, slap that money on the barrelhead and buy back the family farm.

Sun September 7, 2008, 12:25 am: 's foot is asleep.

Wed September 3, 2008, 10:54 pm: just finished reading "V for Vendetta."

Mon September 1, 2008, 12:16 pm: is reading. As ususal.

Thu August 28, 2008, 1:56 pm: is overwhelmed.

18 November, 2009

Car Crash News

For those of you wondering, I'm fine.
I'm on all kinds of prescription pills, so I'm doing real good.

The story is as follows:
Brantz and I were driving, turning right at an intersection (on a green light, mind you) from 300 W onto 200 S.
A girl pulled off onto the right side of the road on 200 S tried to make a U-turn, didn't check over her shoulder, and ended up T-boning us in the passenger side door. Mere inches from my body.
At the ER, they took three X-Rays and informed me of my whiplash, and the strained spine. Evidently when your body absorbs shock, your muscles will tense and pull the curves in your spine completely straight. This happened in my neck, and so I've got muscle relaxers, pain medication, and anti-inflammatory medication. The ER doctor said I'd need physical therapy on my neck eventually, but luckily that's the worst of my injuries!

I'll post pictures later. Also later, I'll post a REAL GOOD list of the funny things I say when I'm on Valium. Mind you I don't remember saying a good 70% of these things.

If people want to send me flowers, I'm not opposed to that... yeah, I'm milking this for all it's worth, what of it?! =]

04 November, 2009

ME AS A SUPERHERO!!!!

Sunny day, Sweepin' the clouds away

Happy 40th Anniversary, Sesame Street.



Without you, my life would have been a whole lot less awesome.